Here are some of the best funny life quotes.
All the world’s a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.
Why are our days numbered and not, say, lettered? – Woody Allen
Life is like a taxi. The meter just keeps a-ticking whether you are getting somewhere or just standing still. — Lou Erickson
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
Live life to the fullest… think of all the people on the Titanic who passed up chocolate dessert.
Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive. – Elbert Hubbard
Roshi No matter how bad things get, you got to go on living, even if it kills you. — Sholom Aleichem
It will take quite a while to cultivate a vintage good friend. – David Leonard
Life is like an onion. Why is life like an onion?
There is properly no history; only biography. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Since Light travels faster than Sound, people appear brighter before you hear them speak.
I grew up with six brothers. That’s how I learned to dance -waiting for the bathroom. – Bob Hope
The perfect normal person is rare in our civilization – Karen Horney
Life is hard. After all, it kills you. — Katharine Hepburn
There is time for work. And time for love. That leaves no other time. — Coco Chanel
Live your life and forget your age.” – Norman Vincent Peale
Instead of holding on to the Biblical view that we are made in the image of God,
Life… is like a grapefruit. It’s orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast.
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made. – Groucho Marx
It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help.
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.- Oscar Wilde
Interchangeable parts don’t, leakproof seals aren’t, and self-starters won’t. – Unknown
I don’t know what weapons are we going to use in the third world war, but the in fourth world war we will use only sticks and stones. – Albert Einstein
Biography is the only true history. – Thomas Carlyle
Ars Longa, Vita Brevis – Art (is) Long, Life (is) Short – Hippocrates
Love is the history of a woman’s life; it is an episode in man’s. – Germaine De Stael
After a long wait for bus no. 20, two 20 number buses will always pull in together and the bus which you get in will be more crowded than the other.
On life’s journey faith is nourishment, virtuous deeds are a shelter, wisdom is the light by day and right mindfulness is the protection by night. If a man lives a pure life, nothing can destroy him. —Buddha
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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I love the line about life being like a taxi. It’s so true. Also like a taxi, life will get you into some jams and rip you off!
I think Germaine De Stael is incorrect about love only being an episode in a man’s life. While it’s true that romantic stuff is typically less important to males, it takes TWO to have a great love story.