Funny Quotes On Life Lessons

by on December 24, 2011

Here are some of the best funny quotes on life lessons.

To succeed in life, you need two things: ignorance and confidence.

You will get hurt by thorns if you make your way, however, you won’t see roses if you are standing in one place. – G. Spa

In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on. -Robert Frost

The real reason for not committing suicide is because you always know how swell life gets after the hell is over. – Ernest Hemingway

Someone said to Voltaire, “Life is hard.” Voltaire replied, “Compared to what?

Every guest hates the others, and the host hates them all.

Life is like a cobweb, not an organization chart. – Ross Perot

Good judgment comes from bad experience and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

A wise man is ashamed of his disadvantages, but is not afraid to get loose of them. – Seneca

I think I’ve discovered the secret of life – you just hang around until you get used to it.– Charles Schulz

Life is a glitch in the universal program

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was “You’ll never find anyone like me again!” I’m thinking,

Life is like a ten-speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use. — Charles Schulz

The trouble with life is that there are so many beautiful women and so little time. – John Barrymore

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.

An outdated good friend will allow you to shift. An excellent good friend will allow you to shift any deceased physique. – Sean Hayes

I swallow to create other citizens attractive.

Money can’t acquire close friends, yet you may get an improved school regarding foe. – Raise Milligan

Personally, I don’t think there’s intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one?

If you would like to add your favourite funny quotes on life lessons please post them.

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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Yonall January 21, 2012 at 2:28 am

Ha ha, this quote in particular made me chuckle, “I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.” That’s certainly one way to look at it! // I came across a quote I like by Helen Giangregorio. It’s a spin on “He who laughs last laughs best”. She said, “He who laughs last didn’t get it.” :-)

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eek2 March 21, 2012 at 11:37 pm

Voltaire had the right idea. “Someone said to Voltaire, “Life is hard.” Voltaire replied, “Compared to what?” That’s basically my philosophy and what I tell others. Even when bad things happen to you, life is always better than the alternative.

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ToBeOrNotToBe April 16, 2012 at 5:34 pm

I have mixed thoughts on Ernest Hemingway’s suicide quote. On the one hand, for people like me, I would never consider suicide while life’s pros still outweigh the cons. I don’t think this is the fundamental reason why most people wouldn’t do it, though. We’re hardwired to survive!

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